July 2009

WENDY’S STORY

I have suffered from PMS for as long as I can remember and want to share my story with other PMS sufferers in the hope that it will help them.

I noticed my PMS at it worst when I approached my mid 25s. I am now 36. I used to work for a firm of solicitors and used to literally dread the onset of my periods being due because I realised that I was going to feel poorly for the next 14 days. Unfortunately, there was no way I could not work and like a lot of people  being poorly and taking time off from work  was not easily accepted by many employers. The first two weeks of my cycle were fine, then as I approached the third week, I noticed the changes in my body as I wanted to eat more food, felt tired and basically exhausted, and was weepy and tearful at every opportunity. I remember one day literally dragging myself out of bed to get to work as my body slowed down, being aware of the onset of a migraine headache over the one side of my head (which lasted about 7 days) and feeling and being very sick. I used to leave my desk at work and take myself off somewhere quiet just to allow myself to feel a little easier and just get away and hide, close my eyes and visualise the pain leaving my body.

I soon realised that there was a pattern forming every month but did not realise exactly what it was, but I knew that once my period had started and was in full flow, I felt better. 　

It is only now that I am beginning to feel better, which is after years of doctors telling me I had migraine headaches and I decided to find out exactly what was going on, and being determined to prove that it was not migraine headaches. I decided to keep a diary which indeed outlined the same symptoms at the same time each month and knowing I felt better after my period was well into its cycle, I decided to push further. Eventually, after fighting for what I wanted, I had blood tests, and after a certain GP realised something else was going on, diagnosed me as having PMS and also provided me with details of NAPS which I was so grateful for.

For a lot of women they feel just like giving up and at times I felt I would never get better, but recently things have changed. A few years ago, I decided to leave the rat race of the legal profession behind and study hypnotherapy and become a therapist. Through my studies, I learned that relaxation during your period plays a very important role. I also wanted to investigate the role this could play to improve women’s health. As I was a therapist I had contact with other therapists and contacted a lady who had studied and dealt with women’s health issues including PMS. I made the journey down to London to see her and after our session I realised that how we feel about ourselves has a big impact on our cycle, which changes every day.　

At the time of our period our body needs to rest. We must take time out and tune into ourselves and we are to love ourselves more and use this time to tune into the wisdom inside us.

At first I found this quite strange but when I started to accept who I was and love my body and accept that every month I was going to menstruate and it was good for my body to do this, I felt calmer. Also, I learned to take time out for myself, in other words not put pressure on myself that things had to be done by a certain time, and that I must not allow family life, chores, etc., to take over during this time period. I learnt just to relax and tune into myself, this is my innate wisdom time. I remember especially being told by my peers: “Oh period again, not good” and I soon realised that this had created a negative self image about my period. This was really unhealthy and therefore I would not enjoy the fact of my period coming and would carry on as normal to try and ignore it and carry on rushing around not accepting my period as a healthy part of nature. What I now know is called moon time, the time when you have your period. You must relax and accept it, and let it happen, and go with it and accept it as a part of natural nature, which is a healthy part of us. I thought, being a therapist, of how interesting this was and I had not realised this until now because you can get so wrapped up and involved in life. Taking time out is the only answer - learning to just sit quietly and relax. So I started to change the way I thought about my periods and take that time to sit and let them happen and acknowledge them and realise that it is good and it was allowing my body to release all the old wisdom ready for new things to come my way, getting rid of the old, but in a good way.

I am still continuing with hypnotherapy which is going well. I have been recommended a wonderful book called "Her Blood is Gold" by Lara Owen which explains the awakening to the wisdom of menstruation and I have found it enlightening and so helpful and would definitely recommend it to members. I have also been on the medication Cerazette for seven months now, which is the mini-pill and have found my periods so much easier to cope with, and I feel so much better in myself and I am also looking into starting Yoga soon to improve my meditation levels further.

PMS is not just a physical condition, it affects women mentally also and how we think about ourselves as women and our periods have a great impact on our life. We only have to look at what the media throws at women today to know how they say we should look and behave in glossy magazines. We have to work on lots of different things to work with PMS but for me this experience has been good and a learning curve. I hope in the future we as women can see there is help available to us as long as we do not give up and keep pushing for it. If we can learn now to love ourselves and our bodies more and also accept that a period is good and balance the two sides, the physical parts of our period with the mental side of ourselves, this can give us balance in our lives and we can feel whole again.

Do not give up! There is hope! I am proof! you can get better with help, which is also why I feel it is so important to promote NAPS to help others. I am due to do an exhibition soon and one of the topics I will certainly be promoting will be PMS and NAPS.